Halloween- Shed the mask.

In African American Lit in High School we read this poem (ooo-oop Johnnie Noble)

We Wear the Mask

WE wear the mask that grins and lies,
It hides our cheeks and shades our eyes,—
This debt we pay to human guile;
With torn and bleeding hearts we smile,
And mouth with myriad subtleties.

Why should the world be over-wise,
In counting all our tears and sighs?
Nay, let them only see us, while
We wear the mask.

We smile, but, O great Christ, our cries
To thee from tortured souls arise.
We sing, but oh the clay is vile
Beneath our feet, and long the mile;
But let the world dream otherwise,
We wear the mask!

Is there a mask that you need to break? Is there someone or something inside of you that you are hiding because you are afraid people will not see you if you take off your mask, or they won't like what they see? I'm letting you know you can take off the mask.. by being you you will attract people who will love you fully and completely. Showing who you really are will bring closer relationships to you with those who love you...

I thought about it and I dont think I can wear a mask anymore. I try my best to be exactly who I am in every instance.. Not that I say everything I want to say... or do everything I want to do, but I don't fake or pretend or act as if I feel a way I don't. I favor silence. I ask help when I need to and I love myself because of it. I used to be an impostor, content with people just seeing me for a wild girl who made folks laugh and made insane comments... and i'm still that... but I am also not afraid to say, I learn things all the time and I love jeopardy and trivia, mensa puzzles and museums... and I'll do that all day.. without shame. I like to read... and hate watching videos on the internet if I can help it. I like geeky stuff.. and thinking of new ideas.. even if they make no sense cause why not? I got a brain, I may as well use it. I'm super sensitive and very passionate and I wear my heart on my sleeve, and I love deeply and can't keep anything a secret when it comes to how I feel... I love hard.. .and some people have told me to cover it up and hold back... but that's just me and I don't want someone who likes the mask.. i want someone who likes me.. so I'm good with that... but I also understand nothing is perfect.. and who I am is a work in progress..

if there is anything you need to share to help shed your mask... i'm here.

Insanity....

is the fact that I almost checked my work e-mail... from vacation.

Home

It's amazing how the concept of home changes. I love Chicago and the city will always be home, but each time I visit it feels different. I guess it is a good sign that where I spend the majority of my time is becoming where I want to be.

Don't get me wrong. I LOVE being in Chicago. I love going down the streets where I grew up. Eating Harold's, getting some Fannie May, enjoying some chili con queso and maybe some stuffed pizza.. if I can swing downtown, I might even get some Garrett's.

No one place will conjure the fond memories of nostalgia than the skyline and the Sears Tower, and my HS and the lakefront. The old buildings on the South Side or the fun of crisscrossing through the Northside to have a good time. Lincoln Park Zoo and the Museum campus will always sing so sweetly to me, but having lived a few different places, I know that home is something that I must create.

Home is the feeling I get when I open my door to my apartment and realize that it is all mine. Home is where I smile sweetly as I hop into my car to drive to see the people I love. Home is so many different moments and emotions that fill my heart. Home is even my classroom, because it holds my future and the future of the country. I put my house keys in my classroom door AT LEAST 10 times a year LOL. That's devotion. But that's home. Home is where your heart flutters and your soul beats and when I think of home.. sometimes... I think home might just travel with me.

GLEE ME

I love Glee.. It's awesome... GLEE ME!!

I loved the duets. I love singing and dancing and the joy in it.. I love the idea that music can convey ideas and feelings that mere words can never impart. Born Again... River Deep, Mountain High, Happy Days are Here Again.. ahhh I need to see a musical now

With so much crappy music.. I think I enjoy the hour of good singers, in perfect pitch that make my hairs stand on end. :-) I love it.. I just love it.

I am lucky. I want to see Chicago next, or Damn Yankees, or anything with Bob Fosse involved, or Dreamgirls.. but not really.. or anything really. I just love music by real singers. with real pitch and real talent. Broadway voices will never compare to anything else...

:-)

I'm getting my Glee para tomorrow :-)

NO MORE DADT!!

Don't Ask Don't Tell was stopped by federal injunction today and so the US is no longer allowed to investigate, or prosecute or court marshall anyone because they are openly gay...

And it can only be broken if the US government goes for it.. and they wont.. i dont think.. I pray.

Thank you for mercy and grace and love and fairness and justice. :-)

I am more happy and proud than you know :-)

I am Liz Lemon

I am!!! I watch 30 Rock and I dont think there is anyone on TV that I feel has better expressed my quirky loveable weirdness than she! I love her wardrobe... I love the collared shirt with a sweater on top... ahhhh the glasses... I just heart Liz Lemon.... If I'm not as cool as she is... i want to be...

LIZ LEMON ROCKS

PRIDE

awesome that I enjoyed playing and having fun with my cousin and his friends during pride. I saw my homie down there for a second too. It was great.

It's wonderful because this is the first year that I can say that I am truly Proud.

I love being gay. I am not in the closet to anyone.. There is no one with whom I am close that does not know this about me and it's wonderful. It has enabled me to live my life openly and freely because try as I might to keep secrets, I am unable to. I work hard to live an open and honest existence because you know, there are only so may chances you get to make a difference.

Part of me wishes it was okay for my students to know I am gay because I feel like it would open worlds for those who are gay and those who are straight. Set a new example. I'm just a regular person. but I dont have ANY desire to be any different.

I am happy with who I am. I am delighted in the moments I get so spend with those who love me for who I am.

I started coming out to myself decades ago, but finally accepted it 7 years ago. Now, I am clear that I need to be who I am.

I'm a woman. I am black. I am a lesbian. I am so proud to be me.

Rainbow flags if I was into that whole thing.. but.. not so much.

:-) I love you.

:-)

Like a Crysanthemum
blooming in the spring
like the rain that falls
and brings the summer breeze.
That anticipated phone call which
puts my mind at ease
something like an appetizer
so delicious, but just a tease.
You leave me wanting more
waiting to explore the different
facets of what you are.