I am doing a little of A and a little of B but i am wondering if I am the only one who struggles with not being productive all the time.
ITS RAINING ITS POURING
And Spiderlgs is in bed snoring!! Today we have a day off because it's a floood! So I am mixing the day with productivity and nothing. I was sitting in bed and trying to get some things done and I wonder if you ever have the problem of feeling guilty when you are not being productive even if you need some time to relax... how do you create the balance? Work or play? or both? or neither..
Hot!!
SO I was looking in my senior book and stumbled upon my What's Hot and What's Not list.
Among the hot- Mariah Carey. Among the not- "Movable butterfly clips" <-remember that shit.? womp So I figure I would refresh it for 2k9. off the top of my head
Hot
Tyra Bank's Real Hair
Janet Jackson performing "Scream"
"Scream"
Tina Landon dancing with Janet
Blackberries
ANTM for Short Girls (even though its without me!)
Nigel Barker (HOT)
Esquire Mag
Obama
"I'm not gonna write you a love song" <-i love it
crushed ice
dress down fridays.
Whitney is Back
NOT
twitter
So you think you can dance
rainy days everyday in ATL!!
LOL Smiley Face
That song that goes.."Forget about your boyfriend and meet me at the hotel room" womp
Mariah carey
Nancy Grace
Prank Phone Calls on Rickey Smiley
ashy ankles
Celebrity Blogs
anything you wanna add?
Among the hot- Mariah Carey. Among the not- "Movable butterfly clips" <-remember that shit.? womp So I figure I would refresh it for 2k9. off the top of my head
Hot
Tyra Bank's Real Hair
Janet Jackson performing "Scream"
"Scream"
Tina Landon dancing with Janet
Blackberries
ANTM for Short Girls (even though its without me!)
Nigel Barker (HOT)
Esquire Mag
Obama
"I'm not gonna write you a love song" <-i love it
crushed ice
dress down fridays.
Whitney is Back
NOT
So you think you can dance
rainy days everyday in ATL!!
LOL Smiley Face
That song that goes.."Forget about your boyfriend and meet me at the hotel room" womp
Mariah carey
Nancy Grace
Prank Phone Calls on Rickey Smiley
ashy ankles
Celebrity Blogs
anything you wanna add?
WTF?
Why?
1. Why was there a chic in the club with braids ala Brandy ? She inspired us to bust into the dance from "I Wanna be Down" right next to her.
2. Why would anyone have blue and purple paint with glitter in circular designs around her eyes?
3. Why would she then decide to accompany that with blue and purple inch long eyelashes?
4. Why do SGRhos think that anyone is hating on them? I mean fact is fact, and aint nothing wrong with stating that.
5. Why do people still smoke and then get offended when you give them the side eye? IF someone pointed their tailpipe in my face and hit the exhaust, I'd kick their ass. You sir, with the cigarette, are getting off easy.
6. Why is Jadakiss as hard as it gets?
7. Why is it still appropriate for anyone to have for real bonafide designed cornrows after the age of 7?
8. Why do people get airbrushed RIP t-shirts/hoodies/sweatsuits/caps? you bet not ever put my airbrushed mug on anything!
9. Why is Black TV so HORRIBLE? I mean come on.. It's awful. After Living Single we aint got much else to watch.
1. Why was there a chic in the club with braids ala Brandy ? She inspired us to bust into the dance from "I Wanna be Down" right next to her.
2. Why would anyone have blue and purple paint with glitter in circular designs around her eyes?
3. Why would she then decide to accompany that with blue and purple inch long eyelashes?
4. Why do SGRhos think that anyone is hating on them? I mean fact is fact, and aint nothing wrong with stating that.
5. Why do people still smoke and then get offended when you give them the side eye? IF someone pointed their tailpipe in my face and hit the exhaust, I'd kick their ass. You sir, with the cigarette, are getting off easy.
6. Why is Jadakiss as hard as it gets?
7. Why is it still appropriate for anyone to have for real bonafide designed cornrows after the age of 7?
8. Why do people get airbrushed RIP t-shirts/hoodies/sweatsuits/caps? you bet not ever put my airbrushed mug on anything!
9. Why is Black TV so HORRIBLE? I mean come on.. It's awful. After Living Single we aint got much else to watch.
Go Sit Down
And because the blog has been a big bummer for two posts in a row.. here is a list of dumb shit I find funny.
1. The Real Housewives of Atlanta go to restaurants I go to. HAHA on a teacher's salary I can afford to go to Twist and FAB. They don't do anything super cool. They live in houses that I could lease/rent in this economy. HA! Only one I think who is prolly really doing it for real.. is Kandi cause let's face it royalties are for real.
2. That chic on So You Think You Can Dance is so annoying.. always hollering and shit. Go Sit Down!
3. My students don't know who said "Give me liberty or give me death" They also write on the wrong side of the paper. Go Sit Down
4. I wrote "Happy Birthday Beyonce" on the board today and in one of my classes the kids got up and did Single Ladies and Uh oh uh oh uh oh oh no no HAHAA Hi-larious!
5. I knew Paul Abdula was out of there! :-) I called it on the blog. Okay I said she should be fired. but ya know. same!
6. I'm gonna join Twitter cause Janet Jackson is on there.
7. That long stroke is no joke. Thank your local pipe layer!
Out.
1. The Real Housewives of Atlanta go to restaurants I go to. HAHA on a teacher's salary I can afford to go to Twist and FAB. They don't do anything super cool. They live in houses that I could lease/rent in this economy. HA! Only one I think who is prolly really doing it for real.. is Kandi cause let's face it royalties are for real.
2. That chic on So You Think You Can Dance is so annoying.. always hollering and shit. Go Sit Down!
3. My students don't know who said "Give me liberty or give me death" They also write on the wrong side of the paper. Go Sit Down
4. I wrote "Happy Birthday Beyonce" on the board today and in one of my classes the kids got up and did Single Ladies and Uh oh uh oh uh oh oh no no HAHAA Hi-larious!
5. I knew Paul Abdula was out of there! :-) I called it on the blog. Okay I said she should be fired. but ya know. same!
6. I'm gonna join Twitter cause Janet Jackson is on there.
7. That long stroke is no joke. Thank your local pipe layer!
Out.
Maia Campbell and Mental Health in the Black Community
There is a video on the internet of Maia Campbell from In The House. i only saw a chunk of it, because I don't like watching people be exploited. I don't think it's funny or fair. And then I found out that she is schizophrenic or bipolar or just one of the two. Either way, she is tortured daily and does not take medicine what that will help her because of their side effects.
So I won't laugh at her for acting crazy or being crazy and I won't call her crazy because its about time that in the Black community we stop either shutting our eyes to mental health issues or laughing at them as a way of numbing our own discomfort with the issue.
So now, instead of talking about it, I'll be about it. All of my life I have been tortured with depression and anxiety and suicidal thoughts. I am lucky enough to never have taken any drastic or desperate actions, but the pain has been the same. I understand why people self mutilate, I understand why people are so tortured that they take their lives. In the past, I have laid in bed all day and all night, unable to get work done. I have cried myself to sleep, I have been so anxious and wound up that I couldn't sleep for more than an hour at a time. The worst part was that I never understood it. I dont have a fucked up life. I have a great family, a good life, a good brain, good friends, my health.. I never understood why I was unhappy. But chronic depression is something that you don't choose. It's a card you are dealt.
I am lucky to have a doctor I trust. With her help, I am on medication that has taken most of the cloud away. It allows me to wake up in the morning and get up without 20 mins of telling myself I can do it and today is going to be a good day. It has taken away the voice that tells me that leaving this world might be a better option. It has allowed me to cope in a way I never thought I would.
There is help out there, and people on medicine or people in therapy aren't weak. We aren't crazy we are just like you. We have a disease, and luckily we also have a cure. If you need help go get it. If you think a friend woudl benefit from talking to someone tell him/her to take advantage of that health insurance and find a good counselor. Life can be different. I am proof.
So I won't laugh at her for acting crazy or being crazy and I won't call her crazy because its about time that in the Black community we stop either shutting our eyes to mental health issues or laughing at them as a way of numbing our own discomfort with the issue.
So now, instead of talking about it, I'll be about it. All of my life I have been tortured with depression and anxiety and suicidal thoughts. I am lucky enough to never have taken any drastic or desperate actions, but the pain has been the same. I understand why people self mutilate, I understand why people are so tortured that they take their lives. In the past, I have laid in bed all day and all night, unable to get work done. I have cried myself to sleep, I have been so anxious and wound up that I couldn't sleep for more than an hour at a time. The worst part was that I never understood it. I dont have a fucked up life. I have a great family, a good life, a good brain, good friends, my health.. I never understood why I was unhappy. But chronic depression is something that you don't choose. It's a card you are dealt.
I am lucky to have a doctor I trust. With her help, I am on medication that has taken most of the cloud away. It allows me to wake up in the morning and get up without 20 mins of telling myself I can do it and today is going to be a good day. It has taken away the voice that tells me that leaving this world might be a better option. It has allowed me to cope in a way I never thought I would.
There is help out there, and people on medicine or people in therapy aren't weak. We aren't crazy we are just like you. We have a disease, and luckily we also have a cure. If you need help go get it. If you think a friend woudl benefit from talking to someone tell him/her to take advantage of that health insurance and find a good counselor. Life can be different. I am proof.
From Introspection to Exorcism
It is not very often that I get on here and talk about real life, beyond bullshit observations and funny rants.. but for some reason I feel the need to just lay it on the line right now. Dangerous to do this? probably. I'm not sure who reads this.. and I'm not trying to hurt any feelings, or front publicly on anyone. And if you feel I am doing that to you, my bad.. but don't say shit to me cause for real... I'll pretend like a care, but know that for real for real, I don't.
One of my favorite teachers was Ms. Leddy. She was so wonderful to me. In my five year old mind, I wondered why she didn't wear pants, and dreamed about having a mother, or growing up into a woman with a voice as soft as angelic as hers. She didn't even yell when Colin Gleason fell asleep in class one day. He slept so hard the entire side of his face was red and he had a crease on his cheek from the folder. She also had a sign on her desk told us to always follow the Golden Rule.. "Do unto others as you would have them do unto you."
I had heard the Golden Rule before kindergarten of course, but not growing up the Christian church, it had no basis besides being the guiding rule of the classroom. Treat others like you want to be treated. It seemed pretty solid. Don't take someone else's pencil without asking, cause you don't want anyone to do that to you. Say thank you, because you want other people to say it to you. Be helpful, because you want others to help you. It worked in our classroom... and as I grow up, I realize it is a guiding rule in my life.
The Golden Rule is important in actions of course. As I go through the day, I open doors for people and say please and thank you even when talking to my underlings. I don't argue or curse (at people), or yell or fuss. I try to be the person who I would like to meet. And this has been good for me. My kindness has meant people are kind to me. My friendliness (shut up) has made me some acquaintances and some friends. I have developed a good reputation at home, at work and in life.
The Golden Rule has also become the mandate of my relationships.
And to that end I am fortunate. I have so many friends in my life who follow this rule. Who give of themselves freely, and who simply ask for the same in return. I love that I can call on them and they will call on me. I love that I can be there for them and know that it is not in vain. That no energy or time spent is wasted. The Golden Rule is also called the Ethic of Reciprocity... and to my 27 year old self reciprocity is a non negotiable.
it is not for me to criticize or castigate folks who don't feel the same way. It is not for me to shame or bad mouth anyone who lives by a different creed. The only recourse I have is to choose to accept their differing standard... or not. And I choose not. I choose not to be surrounded by anyone who will only have me around in times of convenience. I will not be the go to, when times are rough, and when times are good.... poof. I am choosing to dedicate my energy to those people who reciprocate efforts and energy. I am choosing to use my energy to build relationships with new people who feel the same way. And so that means there will be casualties, though there is nothing casual about it. There is mourning and grief. There is heartache and pain, but the choice is to lose them or me. and I will not lose me. I cannot.
So cheers to you, my nearest and dearest. Here is to nights well spent, and priceless conversation. Inside jokes and returned favors. I love you. I really do.
One of my favorite teachers was Ms. Leddy. She was so wonderful to me. In my five year old mind, I wondered why she didn't wear pants, and dreamed about having a mother, or growing up into a woman with a voice as soft as angelic as hers. She didn't even yell when Colin Gleason fell asleep in class one day. He slept so hard the entire side of his face was red and he had a crease on his cheek from the folder. She also had a sign on her desk told us to always follow the Golden Rule.. "Do unto others as you would have them do unto you."
I had heard the Golden Rule before kindergarten of course, but not growing up the Christian church, it had no basis besides being the guiding rule of the classroom. Treat others like you want to be treated. It seemed pretty solid. Don't take someone else's pencil without asking, cause you don't want anyone to do that to you. Say thank you, because you want other people to say it to you. Be helpful, because you want others to help you. It worked in our classroom... and as I grow up, I realize it is a guiding rule in my life.
The Golden Rule is important in actions of course. As I go through the day, I open doors for people and say please and thank you even when talking to my underlings. I don't argue or curse (at people), or yell or fuss. I try to be the person who I would like to meet. And this has been good for me. My kindness has meant people are kind to me. My friendliness (shut up) has made me some acquaintances and some friends. I have developed a good reputation at home, at work and in life.
The Golden Rule has also become the mandate of my relationships.
And to that end I am fortunate. I have so many friends in my life who follow this rule. Who give of themselves freely, and who simply ask for the same in return. I love that I can call on them and they will call on me. I love that I can be there for them and know that it is not in vain. That no energy or time spent is wasted. The Golden Rule is also called the Ethic of Reciprocity... and to my 27 year old self reciprocity is a non negotiable.
it is not for me to criticize or castigate folks who don't feel the same way. It is not for me to shame or bad mouth anyone who lives by a different creed. The only recourse I have is to choose to accept their differing standard... or not. And I choose not. I choose not to be surrounded by anyone who will only have me around in times of convenience. I will not be the go to, when times are rough, and when times are good.... poof. I am choosing to dedicate my energy to those people who reciprocate efforts and energy. I am choosing to use my energy to build relationships with new people who feel the same way. And so that means there will be casualties, though there is nothing casual about it. There is mourning and grief. There is heartache and pain, but the choice is to lose them or me. and I will not lose me. I cannot.
So cheers to you, my nearest and dearest. Here is to nights well spent, and priceless conversation. Inside jokes and returned favors. I love you. I really do.
TV
One of my friends says she doesnt watch much tv... like three shows a week WTF. Isn't it sad that if I watched that little tv I dont know what else I would do to fill the time. I mean clearly I look around and there is tons to be done.. talking to friends,reading books, cleaning the house. laundry, lesson planning, working on stuff, writing, .. but all of that stuff requires energy.. physical or mental or both.
This is when i realize I am a lazy bum. I wanna veg out in front of tv because its a cheap thrill. But with all this brain power.. I should be getting the pay off of an expensive trip.. if TV meth, I should be getting that premium cocaine high.. cause well why the hell not..
How do I combat my laziness and get it crackin. Do I start with just turning off the tv and seeing what happens??? But how will i fight my curiosity of what's going on on RHOA, Dark Blue, Burn Notice, Intervention, Hoarders, Without a Trace, Law and Order (all), America's Best Dance Crew etc etc etc...
I need help :-(
This is when i realize I am a lazy bum. I wanna veg out in front of tv because its a cheap thrill. But with all this brain power.. I should be getting the pay off of an expensive trip.. if TV meth, I should be getting that premium cocaine high.. cause well why the hell not..
How do I combat my laziness and get it crackin. Do I start with just turning off the tv and seeing what happens??? But how will i fight my curiosity of what's going on on RHOA, Dark Blue, Burn Notice, Intervention, Hoarders, Without a Trace, Law and Order (all), America's Best Dance Crew etc etc etc...
I need help :-(
Natural Woman
I wont say I'm going natural, but I decided to not get a touch up cause I dont feel like the burn. Part of this is very painstaking. It has been painful not being able to run my fingers through my ever so sleek tendrils.. but refreshing to be able to wash my hair whenever I want to. I have been trying some different looks.. some have been hit and some have definitely been a miss... and I'm trying to not keep my self esteem so wrapped into my hair (even though the prospect of having wonderfully fabulously thick and curly hair is a motivator) .
I have gotten some strange looks, especially working in a school... especially from my 13 year old students who dont know anything about anything... but I also know that some of my days have been worse hair days than others. I am just trying to surrender myself to the control that comes with hair that isnt going to lay perfectly straight when I shake out my wrap every morning. My b-day is thursday and it is SO tempting to get a fresh touch up.. but I also wanna make 27 a year of new things and new challenges for myself.. so we shall see...
This transition will be interesting. I'll keep you posted
I have gotten some strange looks, especially working in a school... especially from my 13 year old students who dont know anything about anything... but I also know that some of my days have been worse hair days than others. I am just trying to surrender myself to the control that comes with hair that isnt going to lay perfectly straight when I shake out my wrap every morning. My b-day is thursday and it is SO tempting to get a fresh touch up.. but I also wanna make 27 a year of new things and new challenges for myself.. so we shall see...
This transition will be interesting. I'll keep you posted